LUCY AND ETHEL ARE JUST SITTING AROUND LUCY'S APARTMENT WHEN ALL OF A SUDDEN LUCY HAS AN IDEA ON HOW TO GET RICKY AND FRED TO TAKE HER AND ETHEL TO THE FASHION SHOW.

Ethel, you know, I think I have out done myself this time. Genius! Pure genius!

What are you talking about, Lucy?

I've figured out how to get the boys to want to take us to the fashion show.

ETHEL'S FACE BRIGHTENS UP.

What'd you come up with?

This is beautiful, I tell you, just beautiful!

Enough already. What's the plan?

Ok, here it is. When Fred and Ricky are getting ready for bed tonight we each kind of slyly let it slip that it's a good thing that they decided to not take us to the fashion show because they are having one of those disgraceful nude model contests at the intermission and we were sure that they wouldn't want to be seen at something as decadent as that.

Oh, sure. Like they're going to believe that during a 1950's fashion show in New York City nude models are going to show up out of nowhere to waltz down the ramp. Lucy, I'm surprised at you! That was an awful idea!

Ethel, how long have you known me?

Huh?

I said, how long have you known me?

About 10 years. Why?

And in those 10 years, have I ever had a scheme that didn't have at least some hope of succeeding?

Well, I guess not.

You bet your sweet size 46 butt I haven't! And this one might work too.

I'll ignore the insult for the moment. I'm just too anxious to hear how this turkey of a plan can possibly have even a remote chance of working. Let's hear the rest. Come on.

After we peak their interests in the nude model contest we just happen to be looking at the newspaper whose back side, aimed toward them, just happens to have a full page ad touting this nude model contest. That will arouse them to the point of begging to take us! Just you wait and see.

But Lucy, how in the world are you going to get an ad in an edition of the paper which has already been printed? This thing is unraveling before our - your - eyes!

Faith, Ethel. Have Faith!

ETHEL WANDERS OFF, CONTENT, SOMEHOW, WITH THE SCHEME ALTHOUGH STILL NOT KNOWING HOW THE AD IS GOING TO GET INTO THE NEWSPAPER.

AS SOON AS ETHEL LEAVES, LUCY GRABS HER COAT AND HUSTLES OUT OF THE BUILDING AND DOWN TO THE PRINTER'S OFFICE.

Ah, hello. I want to know if you print those gag newspapers that you see at parties and things like that.

Why, yes mam. We can print anything you want us to. What did you have in mind?

I need two copies of the Times with anything on one page and on the back side of the page an advertisement saying that there will be a nude model contest at the big fashion show tonight.

Are you kidding? This is the 50's. That kind of media permissiveness isn't going to come along for about 10 years or so. No, I don't think so. I can't chance that lady. Sorry.

Suppose I have an extra, oh, say 20 bucks for you if you do it?

Done! Come back at 4. They'll be ready!

LATER ON, LUCY AND ETHEL GO BACK TO THE PRINTER TO PICK UP THEIR PAPERS.

LUCY OPEN THE PAPER TO CHECK THE AD.

Hey, wait a second. This is not right! This paper has the nude model contest ad on this side and the who-cares-stuff on the other page! It's backwards, for crying out loud!

ETHEL JUST STANDS THERE WITH A DISGUSTED LOOK ON HER FACE.

Lucy? Did it ever occur to you that you might have to turn the paper around to get it the way it needs to be to line up with the way you and Ricky sleep?

Why, no! Ethel, how observant! Good, let's go.

ON THE WAY BACK TO THEIR APARTMENT BUILDING THEY RUN INTO THEIR HUSBANDS COMING BACK HOME ALSO. THEY QUICKLY HIDE THEIR FAKE NEWSPAPERS.

Oh, hello boys! What are you doing here?

Can the innocent nicities girls, we have changed our minds about that fashion show we said we didn't want to take you to tonight.

Yeah, how would you two like front row seats?

LUCY AND ETHEL ARE DUMBSTRUCK.

Well?

RICKY WINKS AT FRED, WHO CAN HARDLY CONTAIN HIMSELF.

Of course we would!

LUCY AND ETHEL HUG THEIR HUSBANDS.

Ah, Lucy. Any chance we can sit right up front when we get there?

Well, I guess so.

LUCY LOOKS PUZZLED AT RICKY'S EAGERNESS TO GO SOMEWHERE THAT JUST 4 HOURS EARLIER HE SAID HE WOULDN'T ATTEND.

Ricky, tell me something. Why do you and Fred want to go now when you vowed up and down just a few hours ago that you wouldn't go even if nude models showed up?

Lucy, I have to be honest with you. We found out that there were going to be nude models at this show. It's just the kind of thing Fred and I have been wanting to go to.

ETHEL TURNS TO LUCY AND LOOKS LIKE SHE IS LOST.

(whispering)

Lucy, what gives? I thought you made up the part about the nudity. What's going on?

I don't know unless I'm not only a wacky red-head but also a wacky sage!

Well, you never know what these writers are going to come up with. I does seem though, sometimes, that they just flat out run out of plot before the half hour is over!

I quite agree.