So, George, when's Steinbrener letting the axe fall?

Oh, how sensitive! A guy's getting ready to lose his dream job and you make jokes!

Hey, come on. It's not the end of the world. There are other professional sports teams.

(staring at Jerry)

Yeah, and they're all just waiting for guys like me to come along to hire, right?

Well ...

KRAMER BURSTS INTO THE ROOM AND STUMBLES OVER TO WHERE GEORGE AND JERRY ARE STANDING.

Hey, guess where I got this!

(flashes a huge shiny gold tooth)

Wow! Is it real?

What do you mean "is it real"? Of course it's real! And I got a pretty hefty discount too.

Wait a minute. You're standing there telling us what a great deal you got on that gold tooth. Excuse me, but I think I'd just as soon have kept my real tooth. What happened?

(switching back and forth, looking at George and Jerry)

Well, I was walking over to the subway this morning when all of a sudden this thing in the street opened up and this flap swung back and hit me in the mouth. Broke my tooth in a thousand pieces. BAM-O!

So the guys who did that took you down to the dentist?

(grins suspiciously)

No. I told them I wouldn't press charges if they'd settle right there on the spot for $80,000. Which they did without batting an eye. I know I could have gotten even more out of them.

Ok, so you went to the dentist. That still doesn't explain how you came to get a stupid looking gold tooth put right there in the middle of your face. What were you thinking?

I'll tell you what I was thinking. I was thinking that if I looked more successful by sinking the 80 grand into an edifice like this maybe people would start showing me a little respect.

Hey, I thought you got shown only a little respect now!

(laughs at own joke, high fives with George)

(to Jerry)

That's why you're making the big bucks.

(high fives Jerry again)

You know what I think? I think you two guys are jealous of my tooth.

Ah, don't be ridiculous. Who would want something like that sticking out for everyone to see?!

(realizes he can get back at Kramer for the abuse which Kramer heaps on him continuously)

You know Kramer, I bet the women are really going to flock to that tooth. Yeah, you'll be beating them off with two sticks.

(all temporarily daydream at the thought)

You really think so?

(dishing out more gas to Kramer)

Sure. And they might even suggest you get a whole upper made to match. Then you'd be gold-plated!

(Jerry and George laugh)

Kramer just stares as if in a trance.

Kramer? KRAMER? COSMO?

(George reaches out an slaps Kramer to awaken him)

Maybe the gold in the tooth has reacted with his brain. It's possible!

(seeing Kramer is deep asleep and knowing how easily he can bait George)

What the - Hey, suppose somebody steals his tooth and hocks it before he comes to. Man, that tooth could fetch a king's ransom!

(daydreams about living like a prince on the money from the tooth)

Hey, maybe we could invest the money. You know, compound our money?

Hey, like I need more money! I'm swimming in it. It's you who needs the cake. Go ahead, get it out of his mouth. I'll watch out while you get it. Go on!

GEORGE WRESTLES THE TOOTH LOOSE. KRAMER BEGINS TO STIR.

Hurry up. He's waking up!

Got it!

(scurries out of Jerry's apartment)

(Kramer is stirring)

Oh, man!

(holding his head)

What happened?

I'll tell you exactly what happened. George stole your gold tooth and is on the way to the hock shop as we speak. Better hurry.

KRAMER RUNS OUT OF THE APARTMENT AFTER GEORGE.

(rubs hands)

Two down, one to go.

(dials phone)

Hello, Elaine?