WARD AND WALLY ARE HAVING A COME TO JESUS MEETING.

Now Wally, I was told by a little birdie that you stole that makeup you gave to your woman. What's her name?

Mary Ellen Rogers. But Dad, -

Hush! You will get your turn.

(beat)

I found out you have also been a thief on multiple other occasions.

But, Dad, -

WARD DRAWS BACK AN WHACKS WALLY.

Ow! Gee, Dad, what's gotten into you?

What's gotten into me? I'll tell you. I've had it up to here

(Ward motions across his throat)

with you boys thinking just because you are Cleavers the laws don't apply!

WALLY IS DUMBSTRUCK.

But, so help me you will pay the piper!

JUNE WANDERS IN.

Did I hear someone mention a piper?

Dear, get out of my den, please. Wally is being reamed out. He doesn't need any bystanders and I don't need witnesses.

What?

You heard me. Scram! I will catch you up later.

JUNE QUIETLY AND QUICKLY LEAVES THE ROOM.

Now, where was I?

You were saying I had to pay a piper, whatever that means.

Ah, yes, well, as I was saying, the merchandise you stole will need to be paid for. And, you will not get your allowance until every single piece of makeup is paid for. You got it?

(realizing it is best to just give in)

Yes sir, Dad.

(beat)

But can I just say one thing?

What is it?

(looking behind him)

What?

No. What is it you wanted to say?

Gee, I forgot!

Get up to your room, young man. And, tell the Beaver to come down here immediately.

WALLY LEAVES THE ROOM AND TEARS UP THE STAIRS TO HIS ROOM.

WALLY ENCOUNTERS HIS BROTHER.

Boy, Beaver, Dad is in a real bad mood tonight. And now he wants to see you!

Gee Wally, I didn't do nothing.

I didn't either, but that didn't stop him acusing me of stealing stuff from a store. He even hit me. Look!

(Wally points to cut lip.)

Gee Wally, I didn't know you were a thief!

I'm not, Beaver. For some reason Dad thinks I am. I don't know what he is going to say to you.

(looking frightened)

Well, I'm not going down there! I'm going to run away!

Ah, cut it out, Beaver. You can't run away. You're only 10.

Weelll ... maybe I will drink that can of AJAX in the bathroom and do myself in. That would show him!

I think Mom used it all cleaning the throne yesterday.

Shoot!!