Yeah, Mom ... Miss Landers says if I can prove there is life on Mars, or any other planet whose orbit is outside of the Martian orbit, I'll win a horse and saddle.

Well, Beaver, I wouldn't get your hopes up for that. There's a lot of people way smarter than you and me who cannot prove that either. What in the world is Miss Landers thinking making such a challenge as that? She ought to know we don't have the room for a horse here. What a fool!

Huh?

Never mind, Beaver. You just run along and play. I need to discuss something with Wally.

Gee, Mom. Wally's not here. I think he and Eddie were going over to some girl's house and mess around. Mom? Why does Wally like girls?

Well, Beaver. I think he is of the age where girls are taking over his consciousness, more or less.

"consciousness"?

Never mind. Please leave, I need to make an important phone call.

Gee, Mom. Is it about the accountant lady we saw Dad holding hands with downtown today?

What!? You saw your father downtown? Holding hands with another woman?

Gee, Mom, who'd you 'spect him to be holding hands with, a man?!

(giggles)

JUNE OPENS DOOR

Good afternoon, Mrs. Cleaver.

Hello Eddie.

My, don't you look swell today. That dress is boss.

Yes, Eddie. Are you looking for Wally?

Indeed. Ah, by the way, Mrs. Cleaver, I am hearing that you are becoming enamored with the song stylings of one, Mr. James Brown.

Well, if you must know, Eddie, the tunes he has recorded are pretty infectious. The drumming, the horns, all of it. Listen to this.

JUNE USHERS EDDIE IN AND THEY WALK OVER TO THE HI-FI. SHE PUTS A TUNE ON.

FROM THE HI-FI: "HUP HUP. DOOOOO WEEE-OO"

EDDIE FEELS THE GROOVE

Say, June, that is hip. Crazy!

Now Eddie, I agree that we both enjoy this new source of music, but you must show me respect by addressing me using the "Mrs." title.

Now listen to me. June! We've crossed this soul music threshold and I think we're just going to retain the informal nature of addressing each other.

JUNE IS WALTZING TO AND FRO, UNABLE TO QUASH THE RHYTHM'S INFLUENCES.

JUNE IS SINGING ALONG WITH THE RECORD

Maybe the last time. Aaaiiiiiieeeeeeeeeee! I just can't stop singing! Aaaiiiiiieeeeeeeeeee!

Boss, June. Boss.