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Friday July 5, 2024


MORNING
9:30 BEWITCHED - Sitcom, 30 min.
Darren demands his wife user her powers to produce a top-shelf supper for him and his buddies.
10:30 THE REAL McCOYS - Sitcom, 30 min.
Luke and Kate decide Pepino needs a girlfriend and try to talk Hassie into starting to date him. Hassie falls for, instead, the McMichael's Russian hired man, Dimitry Plotnik, who she believes posses the power of telekinesis as it relates to farm implements.

AFTERNOON
2:30 HAWAII FIVE-0 - Drama, 1 hr.
McGarrett gets monkey rash and must be flown to Bora Bora, the only known location of an appropriate antidote. In a parallel sub-plot, Chin Ho falls victim to a telephone scam artist who is savvy enough to convince him that his life savings would be better off being managed by The Bank of LeRoy.
4PM I LOVE LUCY - Comedy, 30 min.
Lucy gets wind of Ricky's plan to begin to take things less seriously.

I LOVE LUCY

You're Kidding!

 

ETHEL

That's right, Lucy. Fred heard Ricky say that he is completely tired of worrying about every little trite thing that comes along, especially those associated with his domestic household.

LUCY

Oh, I don't believe that! Ricky does absolutely nothing around here - his domestic household. I do everything. If anyone was going to go the route of becoming less stressed, it would be me!

ETHEL

Well, I wouldn't take all this too seriously, Lucy.

LUCY

Yeah? Why?

ETHEL

Fred tried something similiar once when he was tired of managing this apartment building.

LUCY

What'd he do?

ETHEL

Believe it or not, he started to, one, get out of bed in the morning at about 11, two, start having the tennants slip the rent checks under our door.

LUCY

I remember that one!

ETHEL

And three, he knocked off at 2! PM!

LUCY

Did that really happen, Ethel?

ETHEL

It sure did! It did until I threatened to expose his scheme of depositing the rent checks immediately into a short term high-yield money-market account, then, a week or so later, move that money into the building owner's account.

LUCY

So, what's wrong with that?

ETHEL

Do you have any idea how much interest income can be rung up on this whole building's tennants' rent money, even for one week?

LUCY

A lot?

ETHEL

Let's just say it was sufficient to sock away, until I ended it, about 300 G's.

LUCY

Whaaaaat?! If it was so lucrative, why did you end it?

ETHEL
(thinking a little harder)

Yeah, that wasn't real smart, was it?

LUCY

It was not only not real smart, it was stupid.

ETHEL

I think I just got sick of Fred laying around for all but three hours a day.

LUCY

Well, I guess I can see that.

 

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The material published herein is intended to be satire, parody and/or just preposterously ridiculous. The resemblance between any fictitious and real person, place or thing without satirical intent is purely coincidental.