LUCY IS HOME WAITING FOR A NEW SCHEME TO POP INTO HER HEAD.

THE DOORBELL RINGS. LUCY GOES TO THE DOOR AND OPENS IT.

Hello. Oh, we don't need any roofing or yardwork done today.

Hola señorita. Somos primos de Ricky y necesitamos un lugar donde quedarnos.

I'm sorry, I don't understand Spanish very well. Could you come back later when my Latino husband is home? Bye, now.

JOSE PUTS HIS FOOT IN THE DOOR SO IT CANNOT CLOSE.

Hey! Back off, Pepino!

¿Nos conocemos, señora? Sólo necesitamos un lugar donde quedarnos unos 30 días.

I said, BEAT IT!

LUCY SHUTS THE DOOR SO HARD THAT IT ALSO CRUSHES JOSE'S FOOT.

Owww! ¿Estás loca? ¡Me rompiste el pie!

LUCY CONTINUES TO HEAR THE SPANISH CONVERSATION GOING ON IN THE HALL.

THE PHONE RINGS AND LUCY GETS IT.

THE FELLOWS ARE BANGING ON THE DOOR.

Hello?

Lucy, you might get a visit from my four cousins today. The are right off the boat from Cuba and they just need a place to stay for about four weeks.

THE FELLOWS ARE STILL BANGING ON THE DOOR.

What? I can't hear you for all the noise these four wet-backs are making in the hall.

Wet-backs? Those must be my cousins! Let them in! I will be home shortly.

LUCY APPROACHES THE DOOR AGAIN AND SPEAKS TO THE MEN IN THE HALL.

Ah, are you men cousins of my husband, Ricky Ricardo?

Sí, somos primos de Ricky. Por favor déjanos entrar.

LUCY TENTATIVELY OPENS THE DOOR VIA A CRACK, THEN WIDENING.

Ah, I didn't know who you were at first. Ricky said you need a place to stay.

Gracias, dama. Sólo necesitamos alojamiento y comida durante un mes. Después de eso, tal vez más.

ALL FOUR MEN ENTER AND HEAD FOR THE KITCHEN.

Tenemos tanta hambre. ¿Dónde está la comida?

(pretending to now understand them)

Yes, it is a nice day.

La comida. ¿Dónde está la comida?

How is the stock market doing? I think, pretty good. Are you boys invested?

¡Si no nos alimentas, destrozaremos este lugar!

(winging it)

No, I don't think the fact that the wheat crop in the mid-west was poor will affect the price of cupcakes too much.

¿Qué hay de su dinero, señora? ¡Danos tu dinero o si no!

Yes, I have a neighbor who was in vaudeville. Want to meet him?

LUCY GOES TO THE PHONE AND CALLS FRED MERTZ.

Oh, hi, Fred. There are some guys up here who want to meet a real ex-Vaudeville star. Can you come up, and can you bring "Little Ricky II", if you get my drift? OK, see you.

¡Esta pequeña Ricky II será mejor una persona!

ALL JUST SIT STARING FOR A FEW MINUTES. THEN A KNOCK ON THE DOOR.

LUCY GOES TO THE DOOR AND OPENS IT.

Hi, Fred. Come on in. Did you bring Little Ricky II?

(whispering)

Right in my pocket.

(normal voice)

Ah, he couldn't come this time.

Well, these men are interested in your old Vaudeville act. Can you still do it for them?

¡No sé si podremos triunfar en Nueva York si todo el mundo está tan loco como esta!

Are you guys ready? ... Well, are you?

Me arriesgaré a dormir en el metro. Vamos a salir de aquí.

THE FOUR MEN LEAVE WITHOUT EVEN SEEING FRED'S ACT.

Hey, where are you going. You didn't even meet Little Ricky II!

Lucy, I am not going to carry this sling shot any more. You keep Little Ricky II up here from now on.

And as far as me doing my old Vaudeville act, forget it. I did long ago.

RICKY COMES IN AN HOUR OR SO LATER.

Where are my cousins, Lucy? Did you feed them and give them places to sleep?

The ate and left! Yep, said they were going to stay elsewhere. Mentioned the subway, I think.

JUST THEN ETHEL BUSTS IN THROUGH THE RICARDO'S DOOR, EXCITED AND OUT OF BREATH.

(out of breath)

Did you see it? Did you see the spaceship? The saucer! Did you? ...

Slow down, Ethel. What are you talking about?

ETHEL DRAGS LUCY TO THE KITCHEN AND TO ITS SMALL WINDOW.

Look! There! Do you see it?

(Ethel points)

Up there! See it?

Ethel, I'm sure what you saw was not from outter space! Did you -

Ricky! Come here! Look!

RICKY RELUCTANTLY GETS UP AND WALKS OVER TO THE WINDOW AND LOOKS UP.

I don't see anything.

JUST THEN RICKY SEES WHAT ETHEL HAS BEEN SCREAMING ABOUT.

¡Una nave espacial! ¡Ay dios mío! ¡Todos vamos a ser comidos!

What about your cousins?

¡Ahhhh! ¡Me pregunto si tenemos que salir de la ciudad, rápido!

Huh? Does that mean you think it was a saucer?