Today we are live in Atlanta, Georgia to take a look at some old photographs that have been brought in by some local residents. So, let's get right to it. I believe that our first visitor has some old Civil War era photographs. Should be very interesting.

AN OLD GENTLEMEN WITH A NAME-TAG IS ESCORTED TO THE DISPLAY EASEL BESIDE MR. WINSTON

Hello, Mr. Warren. Welcome to Picture This! Could you please show us what you have brought in?

(puzzled)

Us?

Yes sir. There are probably millions of people watching!

(seems a little rattled)

Millions? Really?

Yes. Now, Mr. Warren, can you please put up the first photograph you have brought with you and tell us a little something about it?

MR WARREN PICKS UP WHAT APPEARS TO BE AN 8X10 PHOTO AND HANDS IT TO WINSTON.

Here is my best one. It's a picture of Matthew Brady sleeping on a pine straw heap during the buring of Richmond.

What!? I thought they said this was supposed to be a Brady photograph! How could he take a photo that he is in?

Well, I suppose someone else took it.

(condescendingly)

Well, if so, then it is not a Brady original, is it, Mr. Warren?

It most certinly is! Can't you see Brady ...

(pointing to a part of the photo)

... right there? He's in it. So it's a Brady photograph, like I told your guy.

We thought you meant a photo taken by Matthew Brady. Anyway, looks like just a fuzzy thing that nobody could recognize.

That's Brady! That fuzzy spot.

Mr. Warren, do you have anything that can authenticate that fact?

Would a afadavit signed by Brady's great grandson help?

(salivating)

Why, yes ... yes it would. Very much! Don't tell me you have such a thing!

No. I just wondered if it would help. I really have nothing but the photo and heresay that it's him in the picture.

(examining the photo more closely)

You know, this doesn't even seem like photographic paper from the Civil War era. Is this some kind of gag, Mr. Warren?

I beg your pardon!

I said, is this some kind of gag?

OK. I heard you the first time.

Well the, why did you say, I beg your pardon?

(ignoring Winston)

A gag? No. Certainly not.

What about the photo paper? It looks like modern paper. How could this be an old photo?

It's an old photo that I took a new picture of. You didn't think I was going to bring a very valuable, almost crumbling photograph with me, did you?

Well, that's the idea here. You bring in an old photo. I check it out and appraise it. That's it. Being old is the key. What, about that concept, got past you, Mr. Warren?

What?

Did you not hear me?

I heard you. I just can't see why showing you a picture of a picture isn't just as good as showing you the original picture.

(to director)

Can we go to a commercial?

Yes.

Folks, we're going to take a short break here. We'll be right back.

And, ... We're clear.

Mr. Warren. I'm sorry, we're going to have to end this photo appraisal segment. I think you're being purposefully obstinate.

Fine.

(hesitating)

You see that man sitting over there?

WARREN POINTS TO WELL-DRESSED MAN STANDING ON THE SIDELINES.

Yes.

He's my keeper.

Keeper? What's that? Like, your nurse?

(Winston chuckles a little)

Nope. Like my, bodyguard!

So what! How does that enter into this situation? Nobody's threatening you.

Oh, but you are. My rights are being threatened.

(motions to keeper to come over)

Specifically, my guarantee of 'right to display' is being denied.

Right to display? What is that?

Ah, the first amendment? Ever heard of it?

Come on!

(beat)

This is ridiculous.

(to Director)

Bobby? How long we got?

We're back in 10 seconds. 9 ... 8 ...

Mr. Warren. Please take your photo and go on out of here!

MR. WARREN DOES NOT MOVE. AND, THE KEEPER STANDS BY HIS SIDE.

WINSTON REALIZES HE MUST IMPROVISE.

Welcome back folks. Joining Mr. Warren is somone else who seems to want to chime in on this photograph. Please welcome Mr., ah ...

(realizing the man's name is not known)

I'm sorry, what is your name, sir?

(surprised to be part of the conversation)

Robert. Robert Simpkins.

Welcome, Robert. And, no last names, please.

APPROPRIATELY TORQUED, WINSTON SEES HIS OPPORTUNITY TO EMBARASS HIS GUESTS.

Now tell me sir, what do you have to add to Mr. Warren's bogus photographical evidence?

If I were you, I would hold on to the "bogus photographical evidence" accusation.

Are we supposed to be, afraid of you?

Please, Mr. Winston. Can we just get on with this?

I think I have expressed my displeasure at the article you have brought in. However, if you will allow me to comment on what you did bring, I will say that the whole concept of Matthew Brady, one of our iconic photography practitioners, snoozing beside a buring Confederate capital is not just a little preposterous. It's way preposterous! Therefore I believe that your photograph, of which this photograph is a photograph of, or something like that, is a total sham. I hope you didn't spend too much on this, I mean the original photograph, of which this photograph is just a photograph of.

I spent a fortune. It's worth a fortune, I don't care what you say!.

(to the camera)

OK, folks. Next time we'll be in Birmingham, AL for the -

ROBERT, THE KEEPER, MUSCLES INTO THE PICTURE.

Excuse me, Mr. Winston. Mr. Warren will get respect from you.

What?

(to the keeper)

What is the meaning of this! Please step aside. We're still on!

THE KEEPER WHISPERS SOMETHING TO WINSTON, THEN SMILES.

(looks freightened)

What?!