So you're going to the bank today to try to get a loan to open your store?

Bank? Whatever gave you that idea? I thought I'd just borrow the money from the Inn's account. Ok?

GEORGE WALKS IN ON THE CONVERSATION.

Oh no you aren't! That money is certainly not going to be used to finance some sure-fire loss like you're trying to start. No.

(under his breath)

Especially since George and I need the same money to reopen our basement casino.

What was that? That last thing?

GEORGE LEANS IN TO GET THE SCOOP.

I said, especially since George needs the money for his ailing mother.

GEORGE LOOKS SURPRISED. DICK WINKS AT GEORGE WHEN JOANNA HAS TURNED TO FACE GEORGE.

George, what's wrong with your mother? I had no idea.

Well, it's a long story, Joanna. You see, she, ah, she had to have this thing done and it, well, it cost a lot of money.

DICK NODS AT GEORGE FOR ADLIBING SUCH A HALFWAY CONVINCING STORY.

George, that's awful. What type of thing had to be done?

DICK IS FRANTICALLY WAVING HIS HANDS IN THE AIR TO GET GEORGE TO INDICATE TO JOANNA THAT IT WAS SOME LARGE THING. BUT GEORGE TRIES NOT TO NOT BLATANTLY NOTICE DICK.

Ah, well, I think it was some kind of deal where they had to go in and rearrange something inside or something.

DICK'S EXPRESSION INDICATES HE IS SEEING HIS BASEMENT CASINO REOPENING GOING DOWN THE DRAIN.

(beginning to doubt George's story)

So, George, let me get this straight. Your mother went in to the hospital to have some major operation on something or other and you really don't even know what really happened?

(thinking quickly)

You know, I believe that it was some female thing. Yeah, that's what it was.

Oh. Well, I'm sorry George.

DICK LOOKS GREATLY RELIEVED.

How much money did you need to borrow?

Borrow? I thought you and Dick would kind of give me the money. That would be real neighborly.

DICK EXPRESSES ALTERNATING FACIAL SIGNS OF BOTH SHOCK AND DISGUST.

JOANNA TURNS TO DICK TO CHECK HIS REACTION TO WHAT GEORGE HAS JUST SAID.

(answering his wife's unspoken question)

What?

What?! What do you think I'm looking at you for? George just asked you for a large sum of money. No interest, no payback! I want to see what you are going to say now. That's what!

(realizing that George has actually done him a favor asking for the money free and clear)

Well, Joanna, what kind of people would we be if we couldn't help our fellow man?

THE OTHER BROTHER DARRYL COMES IN TO THE INN, WAITS FOR THE OBLIGATORY APPLAUSE, THEN PROCEEDS TO THE DESK WHERE THE MAIN CONVERSATION IS TAKING PLACE.

That's it? I need the borrow the money to open a legitimate business and you're ready to just give it away?

Remember, we're helping George's poor mother.

Could I interject something. I know I never have had even a single line of dialog before on this show but I'd like to speak now.

The way I see this dilemma you two Loudons have is this. If you give George the money his mother gets out of hock and is better prepared to recuperate. On the other hand if you lend Mrs. Loudon the money she and I can participate in the free market and potentially manage a hugely successful shoe store.

So, either Mrs. Loudon gets the money and Dick here goes on with his life pretty much in tact, or George here gets the money free and clear and Dick's life, if only a small part part of his life, takes a dramatic turn for the worse.

(Darryl winks)

JOANNA IS NODDING "YES".

I vote for my mother.

(looks to Dick for approval)

I vote for my new shoe store. Sorry George.

Well, it's all up to you Dick.

(Joanna unbuttons her blouse a few buttons)

How are you going to vote?

DICK IS SWEATING BULLETS. HE SEES HIS WORST METAPHORIC NIGHTMARE FLASH BEFORE HIS EYES. HIS PACKED REOPENED CASINO'S ROULETTE WHEEL TUGGING AT HIS OCCUPIED BEAD SHEETS. HIS BRAIN IS BEGINNING A MELTDOWN.

HE FAINTS.

JOANNA RUSHES OVER TO DICK, SUPPORTING HIS HEAD ON HER LAP.

Dick! Dick? Are you ok? Wake up! Dick?

STARTS TO STIR, OPENS EYES, SEES JOANNA

Oh, Joanna, I just had the strangest dream. I dreamed I gave up my honest life as an innkeeper and had my best friend George steal your money to open a doomed-from-the-start casino. Oh, honey, it was awful. Where am I?

JOANNA BACKS OUT, DROPPING DICK'S HEAD ON THE FLOOR WITH A THUD.

George! Why I oughta -

BEFORE JOANNA CAN SAY MUCH MORE DARRYL PULLS A GUN AND PLUGS GEORGE AND DICK.

Problem solved. Let's go look at our new store site Joanna.

Darryl! You shoot George and Dick and are only concerned with a shoe store?!

Ok, Joanna. Let's go look at your new store site Joanna.

Where are you parked?